I've been keeping this in a word program for the last few weeks, but now it's time to post it.

April 7

There are only a few people who know what we’ve been going through for the past couple of weeks....my parents, because they’re helping pay for it, and one of my friends, because I had to explain why we couldn’t get together for a weekend that we were planning to do, our next door neighbors, because we needed a babysitter and Alison’s physical therapist, because it came up in converstaion about PT appointments today. I’m not even going to post this to my blog until all is said and done. We’re doing in vitro again.

After the embryo transfer failed, my doctor said there was no medical reason not to try one more time, a full cycle and an embryo transfer, if necessary. Beyond that, he felt it would be best to call it quits. He was concerned about my ovarian reserve and felt if we were going to try again, we should do it soon, not immediately, but in the next few months. We had already come to grips with the fact that, after the full cycle and embryo transfer we had already done, we couldn’t afford to do it again. My parents offered to help us out if we really wanted to try it again. Kevin wasn’t real thrilled with the idea of borrowing money from my parents, but he wanted to try again. I was kind of on the fence, having resigned myself to being done, but agreed.

We’ve got some really whacked out insurance right now. The health insurance has a $2500 lifetime infertility coverage. While it’s really peanuts when it comes to something like in vitro, it’s better than the zero coverage they provided before. The presciption plan, a contract that is negotiated seperately, no longer covers any meds for infertility treatment....not even cheap stuff like clomid. So we were looking at an easy $5000 just for meds. After explaining this, the doc didn’t even miss a beat when advising us to get our meds from Europe. Which is what we did. Fortunately, on our last full cycle, I needed a couple of more days of drugs so had refilled my scripts and had almost a half cycle worth of meds left over. While the doctor’s office couldn’t tell us who to go to to get the scripts filled, they could write them for us. We found a reputable company, based out of England, and were able to get the rest of the meds we needed for a 10 day stim cycle for less than $700. They really were great. They guaranteed delivery in 6-10 days and the stuff arrived on the 10th day. As it turned out, I needed to stim for an extra day and a half, so I was 18 amps short. Doc said I could get by with 12 amps, and we were able to figure out a way to pay for it. They were more expensive than the 52 amps we ordered from London!!!

Tuesday was our retrieval. True to form, they had a very hard time starting my IV. The nurse tried twice on my hand, and had it started, but it wasn’t dripping very well, so the anesthesiologist came in to give it another try. He started a good line up in my bicep area. Needless to say, I’ve got two huge bruises, but at least they didn’t mess up my reliable blood drawing spot. Anyway, they were able to get 20 eggs!!! I only had 20 eggs one other time, the cycle that produced the batch of embryos that Alison came from. No wonder I gained 8 pounds in a week! I know some of that was poor eating over the Easter holiday weekend, but I knew I hadn’t eaten enough to gain 8 pounds, especially since I had made use of my dad’s new treadmill while we were there. I guess having 20 20+ mm follicles on my ovaries is going to add some weight. :) We got our fertilization report Wednesday. Out of the 20 eggs, 2 degenerated. They did ICSI on 18 and 16 fertlized. Doctor wants to do a 5 day (blastocyst) transfer instead of a 3 day transfer. Well, that’s great, but it’s also an additional $1155 that we don’t exactly have lying around. It also messed up our childcare plans. My mom had come up Sunday to stay with us and watch Alison for the week, including some of the time that I would have to be off my feet after the transfer, which we thought was going to be on Friday, so Kevin wouldn’t have to take any more time off than what was necessary to go to the appointments. After we got the results and the word that we’re doing a blast transfer, my mom called her boss to see if she could get on the schedule for Thursday and take Monday off instead (Friday and Tuesday are her days off when she works the weekend, which she has to do this weekend). She left last night after dinner, getting home around 11, I think, and went to work this morning. She’ll be back on Sunday night. That left us without a sitter for Sunday in the day time. We could take Alison with us, and have done it before, but it’s a hassle. Thank goodness for neighbors that adore Alison and love to watch her if we need them and they are available (Melissa won’t even let us pay her, but we do pay her neice). That just left finding a sub for our Sunday school class. It took 2 calls, the couple we split with is working in the nursery this week, but we got somebody. Whew!! As for the money, The Bank of Mom&Dad was open and my mom left us with a check before she went home Wednesday, so we’re all set there. It’s a good thing, too, because today we got a call that we need to pay the extra by tomorrow, since there won’t be anyone at the office on Sunday who can handle the money. So that means my free morning will now be taken up with a trip to the doctor’s office. Oh well.

April 8

Well, we’re all paid up now. And luckily, they were able to give us our transfer time while we were there, so now waiting around for a phone call all afternoon. Sunday morning at 10:00 is T-time. :) We have to be there at 9:30 so they can turn me into a human pincushioin again (translated -- start and IV). I plan to load up on the fluids before midnight tomorrow, so hopefully I won’t be quite so dehydrated and it won’t be so difficult. All that’s left to do right now is let the neighbors know we need someone here by 7:30 and make sure we have a schedule and eveyrthing they need for Alison ready before we leave.

April 10

Today was our transfer. As with the retrieval, it took two tries to start the stupid IV, and this time I ended up with it on the palm side of my left wrist. Things went well. We transfered 2 blastocyst embryos. We have more that are still growing, so we’ll see what happens with them. My mom will be back this evening to help with Alison.


April 11

Got the results of the blood they drew yesterday. My levels are holding well. That’s encouraging. I go in for more blood test on Friday. It feels really weird to be banished to the couch while my mom is here doing everything for Alison. She’s cracking me up, though, because I left a very explicit schedule for our babysitter yesterday and she’s making a big production out of following the schedule. Moms.....what are you going to do with them. :)

April 13

We got information regarding the rest of our embryos today. We have 7 that are now frozen. That's kind of a relief. If this doesn't work, in theory we still have at least one more try, maybe 2 or possibly even 3, depending on how many the doctor would recommend thawing for each attempt.

April 15

Got blood drawn this morning. So far, so good. My progesterone was down by half, but Estrodiol is still up over 1000. That’s good news for me. I go back on Monday for more bloodwork. That’s when I expect the Estrodiol to drop (as has been the pattern in the past). I’m so glad to be off sofa arrest. The weather has been nice, so we’ve been out walking again.

April 18

Well, I made it in for bloodwork this morning, despite the weekend from hell. Alison was in the hospital for dehydration due to vomiting, which was most likely casused by Rotavirus, and therefore, so was I. She was discharged late this afternoon. I had to call in for my test results today, since we didn’t know where I’d be this afternoon. They were good. My progesterone was back up a little bit and my Estrodiol, while down, was still over 800. That’s huge for me. Generally, by this point, it has dropped down to 400 or less. I’m trying not to read anything into it, but I can’t help but be a little optimistic. Back for more bloodwork on Friday

April 22

We had to do some schedule juggling so Kevin could be home to watch Alison, because her virus landed on me yesterday and I don’t think I could get both of us to the doctor’s office in time for bloodwork this morning. She needs the sleep anyway. I got the results this afternoon. I AM PREGNANT!!!!!!!

I’m still shaking as I type this. My hcg level is 264, Estrodiol is over 1000 again and progesterone is back over 100. I go back in Monday for more bloodwork. I guess this would explain why I’ve been feeling queasy in the evenings for the past week. I was chalking it up to sleep deprivation because Alison was sick.....guess not!

Aarrrrrgggg!!

We've been making a little potty training progress. (Yes, we're back to potty training entries.....sorry). Alison has been wearing underwear again. Yesterday she was dry the whole evening and today she was dry the whole day (except for nap, when she wore a diaper). Unfortunately, she pooped in her underwear once last night and twice today. And now I'm not quite sure what to do. I yelled at her after the second time tonight, which was probably not the right thing to do, but she pooped not 10 minutes after having been in the bathroom to tinkle and she lied to me about it when I asked her if she had done it, so I was a bit exasperated. Before she went to bed tonight, we had a little chat about it. She has agreed that she won't poop in her underwear anymore and that she will tell us if she needs to go. I guess we'll see how that goes tomorrow. I'm not holding my breath. She just doesn't care if she is sitting in a poopy diaper or poopy underwear. She doesn't want to interrupt what she is doing to go to the bathroom. And when she does go she doesn't want to sit there any longer than it takes to tinkle. Once she's done that, she's done. We're going to need a lot more underwear before this battle is over. And I see a lot of extra loads of laundry in my future, too. :(

So were riding in the car tonight, on our way to church for a game night with our fellowship group, and we passed the grocery store. Alison says, "there's an A." Ok, there's an "A." So I ask her if she can spell her name -- we'd been kind of working on that a little while ago, not seriously, just for the heck of it. She says "A-L-S-O, what's that spell?" And I said, "well, that spells also. Can you spell Alison?" And she starts again "A-L-I-S-O-N, Alison." I was impressed.

Poor Alison.

Thursday after PT, we went to the mall to bum around for a while. No big deal. We had fun. We were heading back from Penney's towards the little motorized rides, because I had promised she could ride a couple, when I realized it had been a while since we'd been to the bathroom and it would probably be a good idea to at least try. So we stopped. We used the handicapped stall (sorry to those of you who think able bodied people shouldn't use them, but the regular ones don't accomodate strollers, and technically, one of us was handicapped). I pulled out the little fold up potty seat we have and put it on the toilet. Then I got Alison out of all of her gear, since she was wearing her twisters, and ready to get on the potty. As I attempted to place her on the seat, she bumped it, pushing it back, and it fell, and then she almost fell, right into the toilet. I stood her back on the floor, grabbed the potty seat out of the toilet and started drying it off with toilet paper, all the while praying that she wouldn't just decide to pee while standing there (since she had still been dry when this adventure started) because I didn't have any other clothes to put on her. Memo to self -- it might be time to start thinking about packing an extra set of clothes, just in case. It took two more tries to finally get her on the seat, one of those tries nearly resulting in another dip in the toilet for the potty seat, but we did it, and so did she. Thank goodness. At least it didn't traumatize her too badly. She's still willing to sit on the potty, though she is a little afraid she's going to lose her seat, even at home.